Devotions

Tonight  I stayed in the dorms and watched an old Hilary Duff movie. I've seen my fair share of Disney flicks, so I was expecting it to be cheesy and thankfully I wasn't painfully distracted by the horribly auto-tuned love songs and the hilariously colorful choices of attire.  No, I watched the movie from a less judgmental perspective. And I'm glad I did, because as bizarre as it sounds, I was actually inspired. Please allow me to explain. Hilary's character, Terri, was undergoing this romantic love story with a shy British guy. They were both artists, they both believed in the power of their dreams, blah blah blah. But the chemistry their characters shared actually convinced me that they were in love. I know it's a movie, and so does every other teenage girl that watches movies not unlike this one. But why did I believe it? Why did I suddenly find myself rooting for them to make it, because they obviously were meant to be? Their love was the good kind. ...

So I realize this post title is very similar to the one below it. I promise it's not because I'm unoriginal or boring, but because GOD IS AWESOME and taught me a great lesson yesterday about trying to get out of the holes you're put in, and it just so happened to correlate with the title from a previous post, so out of curiosity I just happened to read the post, and it was exactly the message I needed to hear as I'm sitting here in this hole. (Disclaimer: not actually sitting in a hole. It's a metaphor, people.) Do you sometimes just hate going through crappy stuff? Like really despise it. Like you've been sobbing all day about something and it even made you break down in a Goodwill changing room sad. For example. I hate being sad because I look up to heaven through mascara-filled tears and mutter "God, why? Why are you letting this happen?" Then I feel dramatic and silly because scripture talks a lot about hardships, and how they're all for o...

Have you ever just people watched for a while? Maybe at the mall or the beach or waiting for your friend to come out of the bathroom... we all do it. My favorite place to do it is at the mall, because everyone shops. You have the old people that go to the department stores, and the young people that just want to play on the "playground" thing in the middle, and then you have people in between. The teens, young adults, and old adults. The middle rangers. I'm not going to lie, it's super easy to judge these type of people. Because at least with the kids you can say "Oh, they're just babies. They don't know any better." Or with the old people, you can call them senile and dismiss every time they do something silly. But the normal people in between... we have no excuses. We are easy to judge because for the most part, we're supposed to be responsible for our own actions. And when I see the easiest people to judge at the mall, the teens that find...

Sooooo it's been over a year since I have last blogged. Oops. What happened, you ask? Life. Life happened. I remember being a little freshman at the high school, four years ago, hearing the words of my senior mentors, "This year will be over before you know it. High school will be over before you know it, and you'll be graduating in the blink of an eye." I never believed them, because at that age I unsurprisingly thought that I knew everything, but here I sit. Months away from walking the stage, speaking to my class, and going off to college for another four years. What the heck. The worst part is that I feel... empty, I guess? I'm not sure if that's the word I'm looking for, but we'll go for it. I just feel unfulfilled, like four years have passed, and here I sit. Months away from graduation. What do I have to show for it? Good grades? A Scholarship? A few new friends? I just feel like a little furry hamster, running on this wheel becaus...