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I'M WORKING ON IT!

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Today I feel like I stepped on some toes. But I've been feeling like that a LOT lately, so it's causing me to wonder if  this "just keeps happening" or if it's me. I think I'm leaning toward the latter.  The issues all seem to stem from me wanting justice, equity, and fairness, especially for those who have been historically robbed of these things. And if I see something happening that I perceive to be a result of someone underserved being... well... underserved (NOTE: the word is under-served, not  un-deserved), then I feel as if it's my duty to call the wrong-doer out on it. Or at least get to the bottom of where the ball got dropped in the first place. I somehow always feel this urge to take it upon myself to find the broken cog in the machine... to find out what in the process could be improved so that the injustice never happens again.  And like I said -- it's this compulsion I feel. It's not something I choose to think about or care about, bu...
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Revival is More than a Camping Trip

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Our church is doing something really unique that I've never seen done before: we're praying for a Revival in our country and we're actually expecting God to show up.  In keeping with the historic precedents of revivals, we're having a whole weekend dedicated to worship, prayer, and community outside under a big tent and we're even calling it "Revival."  "Are you going to Revival?" we ask each other.  "What time are you getting there?" "Are you camping overnight at Revival?" And as I pack up our camping gear and run through the list of all the to-dos I still need to do before Revival, it struck me: A real, genuine spiritual awakening should never be slotted in my brain in the same category as a camping trip. I should prepare differently for a Revival than I prepare for a night under the stars cooking hotdogs.  Yes, I still need to bring a cooler and an air mattress and find someone to let out the dog while we're away for th...
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How to be an Ass

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That's right - did you know the Bible likens followers of God to donkeys? These verses really stuck out to me recently and I've been noodling on them for a while now... These are God's words, speaking to Job in his distress: "Who let the wild donkey go free? Who untied its ropes? I gave it the wasteland as its home, the salt flats as its habitat. It laughs at the commotion in the town; it does not hear a driver’s shout. It ranges the hills for its pasture and searches for any green thing." -Job 39: 5-8 I feel like the donkey in this passage is me - or what I aspire to be, anyway. God has already freed her from ropes and given her a home where she can "laugh at the commotion in town" and drown out the shouts of a driver. It's this beautiful picture of God's creature being freed from physical bondage but also freed from worry and concern for those that used to control her- she is free to range the hills and search for the good (green) things around...
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Okay, I get the message...

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 Here I sit, months after blogging about how I need to learn how to rest... with pneumonia. Forced to "rest" at home for about a week now, too weak to get out and do anything. I haven't been to work in 6 days, and I haven't had this awesome, rejuvenating period of rest, either. I just feel light-headed and nauseous and I have this annoying, gargling fluid in my lungs. It's not been any sort of "break" or "rest" from work, but instead, a forced period of doing nothing because I physically can't do anything. Walking up stairs feels like I ran four miles. And I'm not a runner. All of this is to say that if God wanted to force me to rest, He's accomplished that. I get the message. If I won't prioritize rest for myself, then rest was going to come and find me. I get the message. I must admit, all of this is coming at a rather strange time in my life. I've felt for several months now that I'm at a "crossroads" in my ...
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Resting is my CALLING?

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  God, I don't even know how to title this post.  And when I say "God," I'm not using it as an exaggeratory phrase. I'm talking to you, Jesus. That's right -- the Creator of the universe who for some reason chooses to have a relationship with little old me. Wow. That sheds some perspective.  Here's the thing, though-- I'm still feeling super directionless at the moment. You told me to rest and I still don't know how. I know from past experience what it feels like to be chasing after a calling You've placed on my life, and I don't feel like I'm really doing that right now. Especially because you told me to rest . How can that be my "calling?" You're always challenging your children to grow, and MAN does it feel like a challenge for me to stop doing things. To stop running hard. To sit down. To rest.  I heard very clearly from You about the need to rest, and so I tried to be obedient. I cut out a few things from my crazy sch...
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Dancing is my CALLING

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If you know me, you know I'm not the best at pivoting from "the plan." I wanted to title this post "Go with the Flow," but it felt too weird for me to write. Unnatural. I'll get to the "dancing" bit in a minute... The phrase "go with the flow" has just been stuck on the brain and felt the need to start out that way. As I'm learning to trust God more, the more I'm finding that His ways are not only better for me, but stronger than mine... He's going to get His way regardless. His good and perfect way. And since I'm still stuck on this whole "calling" thing (thanks, John Mark Comer's  Garden City ), I've been meeting with trusted friends and mentors to speak some truth over next steps in my career. I'm excited to share that after countless coffees, phone calls, texts, and root beers, I think I've found the answer! Are you ready?  Are you sure? The answer is: just go with the flow. ... ...WHAT?! Th...
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Cheerleading is my CALLING

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When I was 12 years old, I learned how to do a round-off back hand-spring. It took me months of private lessons at the local YMCA and many, many awkward moments of trying to do a standing back hand-spring with my instructor "spotting me," only for me to chicken out at the last minute and come crashing into her... the full weight of my body... plummeting onto her as I apologized and said, "I'm sorry... I just can't do it!" It was so embarrassing-- with her holding her hand under my back and supporting my awkward pre-teen body while I continuously failed, over and over, somewhere between 10-15 times a lesson. Nevertheless, I persisted. I was able to do the thing eventually - literally once - all by myself. For a panel of cheerleading coaches during 7th-grade try-outs. And once I didn't make the team, I never did it again. You may be asking, " Why did you do that, Carly? Why did you try so hard at something you never even kept up with? Wasn't tha...
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