Say.
I haven't been thinking that much about a New Year's Resolution, and it's January 1st. I did, however, stumble upon an interesting idea and like most things, I will contemplate its potential by ranting about it in a blog post. Here goes nothing.
Even if your hands are shaking, and your faith is broken...
Do it with a heart wide open.
Say what you need to say.
It's better to say too much that to never say what you need to say.
-John Mayer
I think almost every miscommunication I've ever encountered in almost all of my interactions with people can be attributed to one party (or both parties) being afraid to say what they need to say. Call it what you want, too... there are many things that you can replace "say what they need to say" with.
People are afraid the truth will hurt someone's feelings.
People are afraid to say something for fear that it'll reveal something about their identity they are insecure about.
Maybe it's how I was raised, or where I was raised (thanks, relentless Midwest politeness), but I'm just now beginning to realize how incredibly difficult it is to have an honest, transparent conversation with people because I (or they) ((or both of us)) are tip-toeing around what we really need to say.
This leads to miscommunications more often than not. It leads to confusion, or misunderstanding, and in some cases, dishonesty. We're afraid of putting the truth out there.
And I'm not saying we should all go around shouting whatever comes to our minds. Lord knows the world has enough people who want to have their opinions broadcasted. That's why we have Facebook.
No, I'm talking about real communication, person to person. My New Year's Resolution is to be more honest with people, realizing that sometimes the most loving thing to do is not sugar-coat things, or beat around the bush, but to be truthful in the way I feel for overall good of the relationship. It's not doing anyone good in the long run if I hide behind pleasantries and empty responses. If I tell people what I think they want to hear, I am not being honest, and the root of the problems in question will never be brought to light.
I get nervous being honest sometimes, which is strange. If I'm not aiming to hurt anyone with my words, and I believe they are useful for building stronger relationships, then why am I hesitant? I suppose it's easier in the short term... but this year, I want to do a better job of articulating things in a way that is still loving, polite, etc, but also true and good and pure and honest.
So, here's to following John Mayer's advice and "saying what I need to say."
Or taking Switchfoot's advice and "saying it like I mean it."
May it be a year of sweaty palms that gradually get used to speaking what is good, pure, and honest, and true.
And maybe I'll exercise a little more, too.
Even if your hands are shaking, and your faith is broken...
Do it with a heart wide open.
Say what you need to say.
It's better to say too much that to never say what you need to say.
-John Mayer
I think almost every miscommunication I've ever encountered in almost all of my interactions with people can be attributed to one party (or both parties) being afraid to say what they need to say. Call it what you want, too... there are many things that you can replace "say what they need to say" with.
People are afraid the truth will hurt someone's feelings.
People are afraid to say something for fear that it'll reveal something about their identity they are insecure about.
Maybe it's how I was raised, or where I was raised (thanks, relentless Midwest politeness), but I'm just now beginning to realize how incredibly difficult it is to have an honest, transparent conversation with people because I (or they) ((or both of us)) are tip-toeing around what we really need to say.
This leads to miscommunications more often than not. It leads to confusion, or misunderstanding, and in some cases, dishonesty. We're afraid of putting the truth out there.
And I'm not saying we should all go around shouting whatever comes to our minds. Lord knows the world has enough people who want to have their opinions broadcasted. That's why we have Facebook.
No, I'm talking about real communication, person to person. My New Year's Resolution is to be more honest with people, realizing that sometimes the most loving thing to do is not sugar-coat things, or beat around the bush, but to be truthful in the way I feel for overall good of the relationship. It's not doing anyone good in the long run if I hide behind pleasantries and empty responses. If I tell people what I think they want to hear, I am not being honest, and the root of the problems in question will never be brought to light.
I get nervous being honest sometimes, which is strange. If I'm not aiming to hurt anyone with my words, and I believe they are useful for building stronger relationships, then why am I hesitant? I suppose it's easier in the short term... but this year, I want to do a better job of articulating things in a way that is still loving, polite, etc, but also true and good and pure and honest.
So, here's to following John Mayer's advice and "saying what I need to say."
Or taking Switchfoot's advice and "saying it like I mean it."
May it be a year of sweaty palms that gradually get used to speaking what is good, pure, and honest, and true.
And maybe I'll exercise a little more, too.
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