Lukewarm.

I am writing this post from Cartagena, Colombia. I'm sitting outside, listening to the sounds of the children practicing soccer, (they're only like 5 years old, and now I understand why Latin-American countries are so good at soccer...) and life is very good. I have a belly full of pizza and a heart full of new experiences. I have a family that loves me and a new handful of close Colombian friends. I volunteer here in the city teaching English to the less-fortunate by day and go out dancing with my international friends at night.

I'm not quite sure how life could get better. I attribute these various blessings to a Sovereign God that loves and blesses me, but it's times like these when I think to myself, "who needs Jesus?"

Because if you think about it, I can travel to Colombia as a Buddhist. I can eat pizza as an atheist. I can certainly "go out" at night, enjoying the highly festivities as a young adult who doesn't believe in anyone or anything at all. And if I'm keeping it real here, which I intend to do, I can shamefully admit that because these past few days have been so good, I've forgotten where my blessings came from completely. I adopted the faiths (or lack thereof) of my companions, molding to whatever everyone else says. I am not on fire for God, and I wouldn't necessarily say I'm "cold" towards Him like some people are... I'm just lukewarm. I profess His name when it's convenient or when I am asked... but my life has hardly been even a tiny reflection of His mercy and grace.

When John was writing to the church in Laodicea in the book of Revelation, he warned them of this sort of behavior:

I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth. You say, ‘I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.’ But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked. 
-Revelation 3: 15-17 NIV

This is pretty harsh. I don't want God to spit me out of His mouth! More interestingly, here I am, thinking all is well with the world, and God reminds me that I am nowhere near where I could be with His guidance. He doesn't remind me of this to discourage me, but to make me realize once again that only life with Him is fruitful and glorious.

I had a conversation with a European who didn't understand why God was so important to me. It simply wasn't part of his culture, and he was a lot like I feel nowadays... as if like couldn't get any better, God or no God. He was content with himself and quite frankly, most of his life.

But the same man told me that we should always strive to be the best that we could be. He was talking about exercise when he told me this, of course, but it has rang true for me for so long. I can be content with my life if I want, but how will I ever produce true satisfaction if I just stay stagnant with the person I am currently?

I want to constantly be growing and realizing that life is always more meaningful, hopeful, and plentiful with Christ at the center. The devil can turn people away from God by taking away their happiness, but I believe he can also accomplish this by allowing them to live in abundance for too long. I've been so surrounded by constant stimulation and affluence and I feel as if I've begun to forget about how I really do need my Savior to survive and flourish. I've pushed Him aside like my friend did, pridefully thinking that I can achieve my "best" all by myself.

The worst part is that I know better. I've tasted the grace and fullness of Christ's presence and I've lost the fire I once had. I'm not too hard on myself because of my human-nature and God's never-ending grace, but it's discouraging to hear the words of John in his letter to the Laodicea. It's so true... when I realize that my lukewarm-ness has produced nothing but falsehood, I can truly see  how poor and blind I am without the Lord.

There is always hope, though. Thanks be to God. John continues writing,

Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest and repent. Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.
-Revelation 3:19-20 NIV

There is grace, and His steadfast love will help you pick up where you left off. How refreshing is it to feel the Spirit moving through my veins right now. I am new and redeemed and can now begin to live life abundant in Him. And you can, too.

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